It has been so long since I wrote that I had to re-enter my password and I wasn't sure I would remember it. I obviously did.
I'm not quitting the blog, not yet, even though it must look like I have abandoned it. The truth is, I've had ideas for posts in my head so many times, but by the time I think about actually writing, the ideas are gone or stale or I don't want to share my thoughts after all. Pretty lame.
I am quitting something. Or scaling back. I trained for the Dallas half marathon that was supposed to be in December. It was iced out. I'm sure you all saw the Dallas/Fort Worth area on the news, covered in ice. My kids didn't go to school for four days. Travis was on a silent retreat for the first 3 days of icepocalypse. It almost got really ugly in our house. But a child called me out on my attitude and I vowed to reset it and we actually had fun. Mostly.
So, quitting or scaling back. The weekend the race was canceled I signed up to run the Cowtown half marathon in Fort Worth in February. I had already tapered for the December race, and after it didn't happen, I let my running slide. I only ran once or twice a week and only three miles or so. I still had time to pick up my training. But this week I decided I didn't want to do that. So I changed my race entry to the 10k. I've never run an official 10k, so I'm guaranteed a PR. Ha. I just realized that I had no desire to commit to the long training runs right now. I've done a half marathon, twice, so it is not a matter of proving something to myself or anyone else. I'm enjoying my strength training a lot more these days. I can do a 10k without having to commit to running for an hour or longer more than once a week.
I gave myself permission to quit and I felt so relieved when I did. I'm not normally a quitter. I can be very stubborn about it, in fact. But sometimes the grace we so readily give others when they are struggling needs to be given to ourselves.