What It is Like: Managing Sports and Activities

I am reviving my very inconsistent series on what life is like for our large family. It is time to go back to school and our fall sports are starting and life is about to ramp up. I'm going to tell you how our family makes things work, most of the time. Naturally there are bumps in the road and days when everything falls apart (you can read about how I try to keep perspective here). But having some kind of plan helps a lot.

 (That calendar does not have baseball games, soccer games, Chess club, or choir rehearsals on it yet. Whoa.)

First, Travis and I talk about what we think we can handle as a family. We've always maintained a one sport per season rule, and that has served us well. However, as our kids have grown we have to had to continually reevaluate that policy. Our school-age kids have a lot of opportunities to do extracurricular activities. We have come to realize that we have to make decisions based on the child, the activity, the rest of the family's calendar, and our sanity. For example, this fall we are letting Taylor play volleyball, take piano lessons and participate in a Catholic girls group. We were going to let volleyball go, but she wants to play and this is kind of huge for her and her confidence, so we are making it work.



Next, we make it a priority to still spend as much time together as possible. With four kids on four teams, plus other obligations, this can be challenging. We are so blessed that Travis has a flexible job and can be home for an early dinner and to coach baseball and just be around for all the  madness. We usually eat dinner at 5:00 on practice and game nights, to allow time to get ready and out the door without being too rushed. We split up for practices, and when possible keep most kids at home, to keep our week night routine normal. But once games start the whole family goes as often as possible. That drive time in the car helps Travis and I catch up on each other's day and is just that much more time together. We want all of our kids to recognize that their chosen sport or activity is important and worth family time.

                                (Need cleats? We probably have your size!)

Another key component to not losing our collective minds is organization. People often assume I must be so organized because I have six kids. And I try really hard not to laugh in their face. The truth is, I am organized in certain areas of life and a mess in others. And I am naturally inclined to laziness. This does not work when trying to manage our family though, so I try to overcome those inclinations. One of the most helpful things to do, and one that I am actually kind of terrible at, is meal planning. More accurately, I'm good at the planning, terrible at the actually wanting to make and eat what is on the plan. I try to plan meals in such a way that I am not tied down to one thing on a given night. The kids do their homework while I prepare dinner and assist whoever needs help. I keep snacks ready to go, in the car, if possible. This season I'm hoping to reduce our reliance on convenience foods, so I'm not sure what our snack supply will look like. I just know that even if we eat dinner, as soon as we hit the soccer or baseball fields someone will want a snack. So we grab water on the way out the door and know we have food ready to go. Also, the kids have to start homework as soon as they get home, on days we have evening activities. Once homework is done, uniforms are found and put out, ready to go on after dinner. So, a meal plan, clear expectations for homework, and prepared snacks are all essential for us.

Finally, we use the resources available to us and also roll with the punches. We are lucky that our kids are usually on teams with one or more friends, so we can negotiate rides when needed. Travis's parents live locally and can help us out. We love our school and know that we have many friends willing to bring kids home from after school groups or whatever we need. It is naturally challenging to keep a two year old happy at baseball practices and games, but we pay our big girls a very small fee to help us out, so that we can focus on the games. And when we are exhausted or things are just too crazy, we get babysitters to keep little kids at home. Or we get takeout. Or we take a night off from the activities (not for games though--that would be inconsiderate to the team). We try to make sure everyone is having fun and enjoying what they're doing, and if they are not, we adjust.

What does your family do to manage the daily busy-ness of life?

And Then My Head Exploded

School starts in a week. We are in desperate need of a routine around here. We've been living in the moment, having fun, making memories. But we've also been fighting with each other, eating out too much because of lack of meal planning, and falling into other bad habits. It's time.

I sat down this morning to start getting our calendar in order. We have soccer practice and baseball practices this week. In a couple of weeks we'll add volleyball practice and a faith enrichment group for the girls and piano lessons for one to the mix. It is a little crazy. I have to remind myself that we love to watch our kids play sports and discover their talents. This is life, we are living it.

In addition to all of that, plus the normal daily existence of any family, I decided to add in half-marathon training. I'm going to run the Dallas Half-Marathon in December. I am more committed to my fitness if I have a specific goal to push toward.

So last night, laying in bed, I had a bit of a freak-out. What am I thinking? How are we going to do all this and how can I add in the selfish time it will take to prepare for this race? I'm going to be so tired and run-down at times. I'll have to get up really early on Saturday or Sunday mornings for my long runs. I'm not very good at really early.

And then I remembered. I'm not doing this alone. I have lots of people to cheer me on for my running goals. I have an awesome husband who is just as involved in all the craziness. He cooks, he cleans, he weathers my breakdowns. And we're not alone either. We have awesome friends and family who will help when we call.

Most importantly, this is all fun and good for us, in various ways. But none of it is the most important. We can miss a practice if our family is fraying. We're not playing for scholarships here. I can miss a run and the world will not end and my training will not fall apart. All of these activities and commitments should do us good, and if they're not, we'll prune the list.

Because what is most important is not found at the baseball field or out on the running trail. It is found around the dinner table. On the couch before bed, reading a story and sharing some giggles. In the mornings and the afternoons and in the car on the way to the activities. In the midst of eight people living a blessed life.

Overcoming Fear is Awesome

 I watched this class at the gym all summer long. I would be on the elliptical or treadmill or in Zumba and I would catch glances of men and women pushing themselves. Doing stuff that looked really hard. Things involving big tires. I had myself convinced that it was beyond my ability. Too hard, the people were too fit. The instructor might yell a lot. I was just plain intimidated.

But I got bored with what I was doing. I wasn't feeling as challenged. I wasn't seeing the results I wanted. So last week, I finally went to the class. I was nervous. I was so relieved when there was another woman taking the class for the first time. I was happy to know all the exercises. I was really happy to see smaller motorcycle tires outside.

I did it. I finished the class. The experienced members did five sets of the various movements, and my new friend and I only did four. I had to walk some during the jog at the end. But I showed up and got it done. (I had lots of encouragement from a friend. Friends are good.) And I'm going back on Friday.

Back track six months. I wrote about my trip to Blissdom. I don't remember if I wrote about how nervous I was. About how far out of my comfort zone it was to get on a plane and fly to a conference where I technically knew no one. I mean, I had been talking to some of these women via blogs for several years, but it is not the same. And I was sharing a room with three women I had never met. I had a million reasons to stay home and keep it safe. But safe gets old.

Doing something hard, something that makes you scared, wakes you up. Makes you feel alive in ways you didn't know you were missing. Brings focus to other areas of your life, if only because you know you have it in you to get past the hard and boring parts.

I know I'll still encounter things that scare me. That put fear in me. I'm hopeful I can remember how amazing it feels to know I did something I didn't have to do, but wanted to do, to prove to myself I have more strength than I know. I like this feeling.

What hard things are you avoiding? How have you overcome fear?

A New Stage

 I'm still writing about not having any more babies. Forgive me. It is still so new and weird.

A friend was telling me about a conversation she had with a mutual acquaintance. Our mutual friend said it looked like I had moved from having kids to raising kids. I thought that was very interesting. I hadn't really thought of it that way. She made this observation based mostly on my Facebook activity, which is largely workout posts and things about sports. (Now you're just dying to be my friend, right?)

So I've just been thinking about this a lot. I suppose it is true. We are likely not going to have any more babies (says the woman who didn't really plan any of her six pregnancies). We are moving into the stage of life that is not about just surviving but really living and thriving. I'm not saying you don't thrive in the newborn and toddler years, but things are definitely different as you come out of the baby days. And it is good.

But I still get a little wistful looking at pictures of newborns. I still miss the days of nursing. I loved wearing Benjamin and wish I had done that more with the other kids. I can't go back and get more time. So I better start making the most of this time.

But I will always be enchanted by the complete peace of a sleeping child.

Joining Heather of the EO for Just Write.

A Dream

He loves baseball. He gets it from his mom and his dad. While his siblings watch cartoons in the other room, he settles in to watch the Rangers with us. His favorite game is living room baseball, where he finds a small stuffed something and uses his hands clenched together as a bat and the corners of the rug as the bases.

He wants to be a Texas Ranger. It would be his dream come true. Mine too.

This Is Love

 Saturday I went to the UNT Ladies Football Clinic. This was my sixth year to attend, I think. It is always a ton of fun. The coaches and staff are so friendly and welcoming. I'll definitely go back next year.

But this post is about love. Travis and I are huge Mean Green fans. We plan our fall around the home football schedule. So, when the opportunity to compete for two sideline passes to a home game came up, I had to try. I mean, this would be better than any gift I could buy.

But the competition? Dancing. Uh-oh. I dance at Zumba and at weddings, and only then with some liquid encouragement. But this was sideline passes. So I danced. I made it to the finals but didn't win. I'm going to blame my partner and his poor song choice.

And because I love my readers, here's the highlight video of the clinic. Watch around 1:00-1:38 for my moves. But watch the whole thing, because later I catch a pass and I'm way more proud of that.



Also, the fabulous Elaine was kind enough to let me guest post on her blog today. Go read why I really exercise.