"Mommy! Remember that day you colored with me? It was so fun!"
And those are the words that make a mother cringe with guilt. "That day?" Coloring with Lily has been so infrequent that she remembers it as a special day. I'm failing.
I do some things right. My kids are fed and clothed and clean and they get to their practices and activities on time. I say I love you when they go to school and when they go to bed.
But there is a lot to be desired about the rest of the time. Too many distractions that I've let in and let take over. Behavior is showing the effects of not enough attention. Patience runs short because I don't spend enough meaningful time with them and so my level of tolerance runs low.
Words aren't enough to let them know how they are loved. Time to live so that there is no question or doubt in their minds. I can do better.
Oh I know, I know, I know, I know. Honestly, I think this is a theme of parenthood. No matter how much you do, there is always going to be that nagging feeling that I could be doing more. It's that never ending quest for balance. I don't know how to find that balance, but I will keep trying until I do.
ReplyDeleteSuch is the cry of any good mother's heart when the children are young!Maybe not just when they're young! My "baby" is 22 and I still feel a twinge when I choose anything over spending time with him. Of course at this point I know that the days that he will spend with me are numbered! :)
ReplyDeleteI like Beth's perspective... :)
ReplyDeleteAnd Kim's. I agree that we can do better but that we are also sometimes just doing the best we can. The same can be applied to our spouse. Sometimes LIFE just has too much going on at once. But yes, take 10 minutes if you can and get everyone to color around the table. That's a start. And don't be too hard on yourself, my friend.
What Beth said!!! I never colored with my kids much either...should have, though...
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ReplyDeleteYes. Me too. Ditto. (Hangs head.)
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