Grace

We settled in to our seats. Or as settled as we could be, with a busy preschooler and active toddler. I was determined to not get frustrated at the kids at Mass today. Husband was playing with the band, so we would sit on that side so he could see us and keep an eye on big kids if I had to leave with little kids. Church Grandma comes to our rescue, happily taking the baby (toddler but I'm sticking with baby) off my hands for the duration of the service.

I don't want to be grouchy or tense. I want people to see me sitting with my many children and see a mother aware of her blessings. So when the noisy and busy 3 year old girl is acting like the firecracker she is I try to calmly remind her to tone it down. She finds her way to my lap and climbs up. We stand for a song. I sway the mommy sway, so automatic a motion that I don't even know I'm doing it. She lays her head down and then instantly it is right back up because we must resist sleep.

We sit and listen. She lays her head down again, this time not resisting. Another child leans in and rests his head on my side. Slowly eyes close and breathing evens and before you know it we have synchronized snoring. Bound by two peaceful babes I can't stand or kneel with the congregation. Gentle reminders to the big kids that they can still participate.  A soothing hand on a back, a kiss on the head, I remind myself to stay awake.

So maybe I didn't engage the way I wanted to or should. Or maybe I did exactly what we all needed. And I was that mother looking content and at peace with the life she's been given, if only for a small time. Grace.

Grace.

Linking up with Heather again. Go read more!

Accent Vlog!!!!

Hello friends! I have decided to join the world of vloggers, or video bloggers. This will not be a regular feature, but I had to do this one. See, Aimee and I have been reading each others blogs for five years but we've never heard each others voice! We even exchange text messages. Our husbands find it quite amusing, but I know my fellow bloggers don't think it is weird at all.

So anyway, this accent vlog has been going around for awhile now. Lee posted hers today and I decided it was time to do my own. You'll see me looking off to the side a lot--that is to read the list of words and questions we're supposed to use to reveal our accents if we have them. Oh, and I mistakenly said that Lee says pajamas the same way I do, but I'm not about to record the whole thing again for one small mistake. I hope you like it!

Yes, I absolutely did put on lipstick before recording. I was already wearing jewelry and cute clothes, for my trip to the fancy Wal-Mart. And it is quiet in the background because Lily is at Mother's Day Out and Ben is sleeping and the big kids are at school. And you can't see the massive mess, although the bookshelf behind me gives you a clue. 

The Well

Linking up to Just Write again. Thanks for the push Heather!




So I've done this little writing exercise four times now. And I've enjoyed every one. I've felt inspired and challenged and the words have come fairly easily. Until today.

Yesterday was a day of elation, in my sports world. A day of guilt in my mom world. I was at a riveting playoff baseball game and my 9 yo daughter was home, puking. Thank goodness our sitter was a friend from church with grown kids of her own. She handled it all and told us we better not leave the game. So we didn't. It was a great game. I thought maybe I would write about that.

Today I took cupcakes to my 10 yo daughter at school. Her birthday was yesterday. We celebrated Sunday. She got her ears pierced. I am feeling wildly unprepared for this stage of parenting. This is when we all start to remember the hurts and petty jealousies that people can thoughtlessly inflict on each other. So my heart hurts a little bit already, before it even begins. Lord, help me be the Mom she needs.

I didn't know what I would write today. I still don't know what I want to write. I have words somewhere, waiting to get out. Maybe I need to step away to find them.

Momma Got Messy

I meant to write about my mud run experience a couple of weeks ago, but life got in the way.

That's me. Covered in mud.

A few of my college girlfriends decided to the Jailbreak (loud video on the front page, fyi) this past September. One girl had done a mud run in the spring and had so much fun that she somehow convinced more of us to try it. Considering I hate to get dirty and am really rather prissy, this is no small task.

The race was a 5K. I was prepared for stretches of mud, but this race was mud from beginning to end. In between the obstacles the course was just mud. I found it rather hard to run in mud, I guess I'm not light of foot, because of the slipping and sliding. Some of the obstacles included an army crawl through mud under police tape, sliding down a mud hill into a giant mud puddle, climbing a ramp using a rope (the ramp was covered in mud), climbing a cargo net hung over a metal frame (totally shaking when I got done with that one because I hate heights) and various other things.

It was so fun! We weren't worried about our time at all and waited for each other along the way. We cheered each other on. I didn't skip a single obstacle, even though it took me a few tries to complete a couple of them. This race was all about doing something new and overcoming challenges.

I can't wait to do another one!

We Need

 Something on the calendar every day. Practice here, meeting there, drive, drive, drive. We need to eat. We need to play. We need.

Everyone in the house was in bed and asleep by 9:00 on Sunday night. What an indulgence! I hoped I would wake up refreshed and renewed. I woke up sneezing and even more tired. Thankfully seemed to be allergies and I found the energy to get done what needed to get done.

I happily took a meal to another family with a new baby. (Thank goodness for friends with babies for me to hold!)

Rangers win! Hooray! We watched Mad Men. I was reminded to be grateful.

And then this morning. Arguing, crying, wishing for a different family (not me). Assurances that this is precisely the family we need, chosen by God, not us. Hugs and words of affirmation.

Prayers and pleas. We need.

Please join Heather for more Just Write entries.