How Did This Happen?

As a parent of four children prior to the arrival of BG, you would think I would no longer be stunned by the swift passage of time. Or maybe only I would think that. Whatever you may be thinking at this point (perhaps I should get to the point?), I don't stop being stunned. BG is a month old today! One month! And I am suprised not so much by the changes she has undergone already, but more at the mere fact that this much time has passed. She has slipped into our lives as well as can be expected. There are times that she must cry for a bit, as I prepare her sister's lunch for school or change Monster's diaper. Thankfully, I'm not nearly as stressed by her cries as I was with my first. I can't believe I'm a mother of five--and that I'm actually pretty decent at it. We're so glad she's here.

Oh, and about the appearance of a smile. We get lots of spontaneous grins, not always followed by some manifestation of gas. I still think they are accidental smiles. However, family, including Husband, would swear they have had direct eye contact followed by a smile, suggesting intent on BG's part. If so, we might have the most advanced baby on the planet. Or not, but I'm her mom and I can exaggerate.

A Failure Already

I never got around to that third post last week. My apologies. I have set a goal of posting at least three times a week, but so far I'm not succeeding. I don't want to lose all of my readers, but I'm dangerously close to doing so. Oh well, such is life.

So we celebrated Easter this weekend. Even here in TX we had to find ways to warm up our pretty dresses. Here are the big kids in their fancy clothes. BG had a cute dress too, but it was covered up by a sweater and a blanket and no one actually saw it. So no picture of her in the dress this time. She'll wear it again though.

And here is a picture of BG at 3 weeks. I'm trying to keep a picture up each week, for the family that is not in town. As usual getting a picture of her that is as cute as she is in person proved impossible. I can't believe she is already almost 4 weeks old! I hate to say it, but time really does fly. Life moves on and she is just a part of it and already we are all adjusting. Crazy.

Perspective and Discipline

Last night, as I was up with BG for yet another feeding, I was mentally composing a post about how hard all this is. About how tired I am. Part of me still wants to post it, but I'm resisting. Daylight and a brief nap have given me a dose of perspective. I know this stage will pass and soon enough. She's already been here for three weeks!

In those three weeks, discipline appears to have taken a vacation from our home. It all came to a head this past Sunday at dinner. We joined another family at a restaurant after Mass. This is fairly common for us, and our kids usually do quite well eating out. Not so much this time. I was in the car nursing for much of the drama, but Husband conveyed the basic details to me. Food was thrown (by the 2 1/2 year old), chairs were vacated too many times, drinks were spilled, and so on. Husband was seething with anger when they came to the car. We took the kids home and put them straight to bed at 8:00, earlier than usual, especially on spring break.

We need to reset things. Obviously life has changed in the last few weeks, but that is no excuse to let things slide. Our children will only learn to behave with consistent discipline. We want to enjoy being around our children and we want others to enjoy their company (or at least not be bothered by it). We have fallen into the habit of not eating together at dinner with the arrival of BG. Partly because I was often nursing at meal time, but also out of laziness. There is nothing on TV that can't wait 20 minutes for us to sit together at the table and eat. I may not be able to get up and address an issue while nursing, but I can follow it up when done. Our patience has not been stellar. Prayer can help us with that. I think our discipline strategies are effective, we have just not been using them. It is time to start again.

I had a talk with the kids when they went to bed on Sunday night. I let them know how disappointed we were in their behavior. I told them we would not be going to a restaurant for a while, until we felt like their behavior had changed for the better. I could tell that the girls at least understood how we felt and were feeling bad about their choices. We are still dealing with some sibling issues, but those are normal. And being on spring break has thrown everyone off, as Princess misses her school routine and the other kids miss their daily routines. We'll get through this, better than ever. But it is sometimes hard.

So no pity party for myself. Just a conscious decision to take each moment as it comes and try to handle it with grace. Or at least without anger and frustration.

Feeling the Pinch

How many meanings can one blog title have? Well, let me just share with you.

Where am I feeling the pinch? Let's begin with groceries. I have been reading about the increase in grocery costs, but it seemed it was not affecting us too much. Until now. The last time I bought groceries was right before the arrival of BG. I resumed my role as chief meal planner and grocery shopper this weekend. First we hit Sam's, where prices had not really changed. Yesterday I headed to my trusty Kroger. They usually have the best prices overall. I made my list and hit the store. As I was walking the aisles gathering my items, I was forced to think about each and every purchase. Do we really need this? Is it worth the money? We use cash for food now, so I was definitely on a budget. I am glad I am being more intentional about my purchases, but man we are going to have to really reconsider what we eat. What I bought yesterday cost me more than it would have just a few weeks ago. I use coupons when I can. I watch for sales. I try not to buy convenience foods as much as possible. I want my kids to eat decent food, especially snacks. So it is no good when the yogurt we all prefer costs 60 cents a container. Perhaps this will help Husband and I lose weight. If we can't buy a bunch of food, we can't eat a bunch of food, right?

Husband works in the housing market. This is not the ideal time to be in that market. So, we are feeling the pinch in our income. It has been steady, but we are anticipating a downturn and so are trying to plan for that. The biggest part of this is living on cash. Husband pays the bills online, then we look at what we have left and divide it up into our various envelopes. If the envelope is empty, we go without wherever possible. This has been very challenging. Also, we are putting off saving for some things I wanted to do. Like go to Disney. It seems every person I know is going or just went. I so want to go while my children (especially the girls) are in this stage where it is all still magical. But that is not practical for us. So I'm working on being content with the little things we can do here. We made the choices we have made knowing that we would not get to live the life of everyone else, at least some of the time. We're trying to live like no one else, so later we can LIVE like no one else (see Dave Ramsey for clarification).

Where else are we pinched? How about the waistline? My pregnancy weight is gone, but that does not mean that my body is back to the same shape. Because it is definitely not. I got the opportunity to do a little shopping last Friday with just BG. I left somewhat discouraged. First of all, I have to consider nursing accessibility in my wardrobe choices. I did not find a lot of interesting tops. I found a lot of plain t-shirts or fussy button-down shirts, but no visually interesting pull-overs. Unless they were the tunic style, which just reminds me too much of maternity tops. Anyway, I also tried on some skirts and pants and need a bigger size than I like. And I'm short. I really need to shop at some better quality stores, but that is not likely to happen soon. So I'll get over it. Some things fit from pre-pregnancy that I feel good in. And the solution to getting in shape is on the horizon. We got rid of our treadmill due to a lack of space. Husband has been going to a gym right by our house for several months (or paying for it anyway). I did not think joining this gym was an option for me because we thought there was no childcare. But there is! And it is free! And for me to join with Husband will only add 20 dollars to the monthly fee. So, when I get the all clear to get moving again, I'm joining my first gym. I'm excited. I actually miss exercising regularly.

So, we're feeling the pinch now. But, we are taking steps to get rid of that and enjoy a better life. I have more thoughts on our financial class that I hope to post about later this week. Also, I have a post brewing in my head about the need to reset the discipline strategy at our house. So, you just might get 3 posts this week that are not baby focused. I'm sure you are waiting with bated breath.

Two Weeks

These are the best pictures I could get today. BG is awfully squirmy and her cutest faces are always when no camera is handy. I managed my first outing alone today and we all did great. She weighs 7 lbs. 14 oz., so back to her birth weight. She's gaining about an ounce a day--hooray.

On Our Own

It is official. I am now on my own. My dad left this morning and there is no more help coming. With the first couple of kids this was a very emotional day for me. However, experience has come to my rescue and I feel confident that we will all survive. In fact, things have gone so well overall that we could have been on our own sooner if I had been allowed to drive. Baby Girl is a fairly easy baby, although she has her moments. The nursing pain is subsiding, so that I don't cringe the entire time anymore. Still, I wouldn't mind some device that sped us to the one month point. Tomorrow I will attempt my first outing by myself with the kids. We have a two-week weight check for Baby and Monster has to have his ears checked (ear infection last week). Even though I have done this five times now, I still can't believe how much babies change so quickly. BG (baby girl from now on) already looks different and has much longer, more frequent awake times. I want to post a picture but haven't been able to get a good one yet.

I reached a personal milestone yesterday and managed to wear an entire non-maternity outfit! Granted, it was a pair of jeans one size bigger than all of my others, but I didn't care. And by the end of the day I was ready to put my lazy pants back on, but it was still a victory. Husband doesn't know it yet, but my wardrobe is going to need some adjustments. I need more nursing friendly tops. And more nursing bras. Any suggestions in that department? I can't believe I'm talking about underwear on my blog. I wish I could exercise already. I have lost all but one pound of pregnancy weight (I know I'm lucky, please don't hate me), but I want to lose about ten pounds. I'm itching to get moving again, especially with nice weather upon us and bathing suit season approaching (ugh!).

Okay, clearly my brain is on ramble mode so I'll spare you any further meandering thoughts.

Snow Day

I'm sure to be behind in posting our pictures of the snow. But my brother doesn't read other blogs and I told him I would post pictures for him (he is in Ohio studying to be a priest!). We had a lot of snow yesterday. Way more than is normal for our location (TX). Husband was kind enough to get the kids all geared up to play in it this morning. I was sleeping (Oh sweet sleep, how I miss you). Here are some pictures of the fun and a picture of Baby taken this week. I'll try to get a better one of her sometime this weekend.

Sorry for the funky picture arrangement. I don't know how I did that and I don't have the desire to fix it right now. I promise to resume mediocre blogging sometimes soon.

One Week

We're all still here. Baby Girl is officially one week old. And she acts like it. Someone needs to tell her how we function here in the outside world--dark means sleep, light means awake. Really, she is just doing the typical baby things most of the time. We did have a rough night requiring Husband to go to the grocery store at 12:45 a.m. to get a pacifier (Monster had hidden the one we had around) and bottles, just in case we had to resort to that. Oh yeah, that was the same night it snowed for several hours. He's a hero, going out in the cold after being woken by his crying wife and baby. I'm feeling great--hard to believe I had surgery a week ago. The nursing soreness comes and goes--it is mainly due to the way she latches I think, but the Soothies seem to be helping (at least mentally anyway). We take her in for a weight check tomorrow and I am curious to see how she has grown. Monster might be getting sick (of course), so I'm really glad my mom is here to help.

Many of you want to know her name. I won't post it on the blog, but you can email me and I will tell you what we call her. I know I have some of your emails, but I just had a baby and I'm using that as an excuse to be lazy. Email me at my profile address and I will spill the beans.

We're on a two hour nursing schedule right now it seems, so I better go and eat while I can. Maybe I will get around to posting pictures of my baby gear that I love, in the next few days. Maybe.

Ouch!

So you might think I'm in pain due to the whole major abdominal surgery event. But not so much. Really, just some mild discomfort that will go away in time. Nothing a little Tylenol can't alleviate. But, there are some pains going on. Like nursing--holy cow! I know the initial pain of latching on will pass, but right now it curls my toes and makes me wince. I went through this with Monster and I know it gets better. I just hope it gets better soon. In the meantime, Lansinoh is my friend. Also, apparently the hormone changes and waves of fatigue have wreaked their havoc. I'm sporting some ugly fever blisters on my upper lip. I seriously went from noticing the telltale little bump to full blisters in about six hours. Thank you for Abreva--hopefully the sores will subside quickly. And finally, I could do without sneezing or coughing until all soreness from surgery has gone away.

Seriously, things are going along so smoothly I shouldn't even say anything. Baby Girl is a dream so far. And I really wanted a girl and I can't believe I got one! I tried to keep my desire for a girl minimal, so as to not cause any unintentional feelings of regret should we have had a boy. But I was so happy when they said we had a girl. I can't wait to buy her clothes!

Perhaps a future post will be less baby-centric, but I wouldn't count on it.

We're Home

Well, we made it home today. Thanks for all the happy thoughts and prayers. I feel great--really better than anyone should feel after giving birth. I'm sure it is thanks to the prayers of thsoe who love us. Baby is perfect--sweet and loves to eat. She's crying now (of course), so I must go.

Thanks Friend for your guest post--too funny! I hope I'll be back soon. :)

more pics

here are some updated pictures of Nicole and the baby. I have to admit that Nicole looks freakin awesome. Can anyone say 6 kids????

posted by Husband